The Grey

I've been floating recently.

Into the bleak places, through the layers of grey,
sometimes I surface to the light.
In this new space of mine there is at least light,
most days I get a couple hours, if I'm here to see it.
If I am I will bask in it, literally, and for a little
while I feel like a person. I feel real, I feel whole.
The gold washes over me and penetrates the dark
parts. Then, like a switch is flicked, a reaction begins
and my soul begins to fire, the glow from inside
slowly spreading throughout me.
Giving me the energy to handle everything.

I don't know why the feeling can't last.
But it can't.
I begin to sink again.